WHY DISCOVERING YOU ARE AN EMPATH WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE

I worked in various office jobs for 11 years. I could never understand why I got so stressed when I had a deadline. My colleagues thought I was over sensitive and dramatic. Most days at the office I felt completely exhausted. I thought I wasn’t strong enough for the 9 to 5 life and I had constant low level anxiety.

My gut feeling was telling me ‘there must be more to life than this’, but I couldn't understand why I felt that way, and I didn't want to seem arrogant by expressing this sentiment out loud. I just didn’t seem to enjoy the same things everyone else did. I felt alone.

And then I discovered I’m an Empath! I realised the reason the 9-5 was draining my soul was not because I was weak or not good enough. It’s because being an Empath means I process things differently. I perceive subtleties which the majority of people are not aware of and I need time to myself to come to terms with all the extra information I pick up. 

Empaths are creative, free thinkers and intuitive.

Often administrative roles don't offer the opportunity to be creative and to show our true personality. Empaths are also driven by a sense of purpose which they need to fulfill in order to feel content. This is why I was feeling unhappy without fully understanding the reason.

Everything changed for me when I saw an advert for an online summit and I felt drawn to watch Dr Judith Orloff’s presentation called ‘Trauma Healing for Empaths and Highly Sensitive People’. I wasn’t sure why, but I knew I had to watch it even though I didn’t know what an Empath was and why I was so interested in this topic.

Amazingly to me, I resonated so much with Dr Orloff’s story, especially when she told us that as a child she never felt understood by her parents who were telling her to get a ‘thicker skin’ and she felt hurt by her mum’s critical comments. I thought ‘me too!’.  And I remembered that when I was a child I felt exactly the same, that I had nothing in common with my family and no one truly understood me. 

I felt different because of my innate sensitivity. I’ve always been an Empath and I never knew it!

Once you identify yourself as an Empath, this will be the start of your ‘Empath’s journey’. You’ll then mentally re-visit your life and past experiences in light of this discovery. A lot of things that didn’t make sense to you at the time, or you didn’t even acknowledge, will suddenly become clear or have a whole new meaning for you. Most importantly,  you’ll understand yourself better,  you’ll know why you do what you do, why you never liked certain things or why you thrive on others.

For example, I never knew I picked up people’s emotions and felt these in my body. When I was working in offices, oftentimes I wasn’t stressed when I started the day, but I was becoming stressed out if people around me were stressed. I absorbed these unwanted emotions until I understood what was happening and that I could stop it. I could detach myself or protect my energy. In fact now I just tune into people’s energy. You don’t have to be an emotional sponge, you can empower yourself.

I also always knew I was an extrovert. I like being around people, it’s fun for me and I get a buzz from social interactions, but I often felt exhausted after attending a big party or a concert. I always thought it was a bit ‘weird’. I like people but sometimes I don’t want to be around them, and I prefer to be at home or in the garden on my own. This is because as an Empath I need to recharge my energy and I can only do this if I ‘withdraw’ from the world and focus my attention inwards. It’s part of my self-care now. I make sure I recharge by going for a walk in nature, by meditating in the morning or by sitting in a park with a book.

I learned about protection strategies and grounding techniques from Dr Orloff’s ‘The Empath’s Survival Guide’. It really changed my perspective about life. I felt ‘validated’. I understood it’s OK to feel what I feel, there’s nothing wrong with me and there are many other people like me in the world. In fact, 1 in 5 people are Empaths. I’m not alone but I was feeling alone because I didn’t know I’m an Empath. I now honour and protect my sensitivity. There’s absolutely nothing wrong about being sensitive, it’s not an illness, it’s a precious gift. 

What happened was a shift in my mindset. As a coach, I know how your mindset is so important. I now picture my sensitivity as a beautiful pink orchid. If you go to buy an orchid in a supermarket, will you chuck it in the boot of your car with the rest of your shopping, or will you handle it with care and place it on the seat next to you? This is how I see my sensitivity, as a beautiful thing to respect and nurture.

Once I discovered Dr Orloff’s work I finally understood myself. I know why I’m sensitive to loud noises and strong lights. I don’t like extreme temperatures, too cold or too hot is not good for me. I’m prone to sensory overload unless I learn to protect myself from all the external stimuli. I know I need to spend time in nature to heal myself and recharge, so I can continue to be caring and kind to others. 

If I’m overwhelmed I’m no good to anyone, myself included, and I can’t help my clients either. This is why my self-care is fierce now. I fill my cup first and it’s not selfish, because if I burn out I won’t be my best self and I won’t be able to help anybody who might need me.

I’ve also discovered what my empathic superpowers are. I’m an Emotional Empath because I feel people’s emotions and I’m clairsentient. I get feelings about the future and I can even sense the future emotional state of people, which are great skills to have if you are a coach! I always had these abilities but I didn’t know why I was getting those feelings. I was scared of what I was feeling, so I pushed it all away. 

If this is resonating with you, maybe it’s because you’re an Empath too. 

Check out Dr Judith Orloff's The Empath's Survival Guide online course  (affiliate link)*

The first step is understanding your sensitivity and, if you would like to discover how coaching can help you live your best life as an Empath, let’s chat! Book a free consultation with me

*There’s an affiliate link in this post, which means I may receive a commission if you purchase something through that link. However, please be assured I only recommend products I have personally used and love!